You want to have a winning experience at the pageant and yet something prevents you from achieving the results you want. Most inner blocks fall into one of four major types: gremlins, assumptions, interpretations and limiting beliefs.
Have you heard the old saying “when you assumesomething, you make an ASS out of U and ME”? LOL. Although assumptions don’t always lead to a negative outcome, they have the potential of limiting our possibilities and holding us back because we’re afraid.
An assumption is believing that because something happened to us in the past, it’s going to happen again.
Some typical pageant assumptions may be:
- I’m clumsy and can’t walk in heels (after you tripped on stage).
- The on-stage questions they ask in pageants are too hard (your mind went blank).
- The pageant judges are too critical (one judge had a sour look on her face the whole time).
- Pageants are fixed, so why bother (you didn’t win).
- Pageant contestants are unfriendly and too competitive (the girls didn’t talk to you).
- Pageants are unorganized and a waste of my time (it was a logistical nightmare).
Because an assumption is based on a personal experience, it may be harder to detach from the emotions associated with that event. However, holding onto an assumption without separating the fact from the fiction could hold you back from experiencing things that may benefit you. Just because it happened once, what makes you think that it will be like that every time?
Assumptions can come in big or little forms. For example, the first time I tried a particular self-tanning product, I didn’t like the results. I was streaky and the color wasn’t right, so I called the company to ask for a refund. The customer representative was very nice and asked me two questions.
The first she asked was if I had watched the instructional video that came with the product. No, I hadn’t watched the video. I assumed all I had to do was apply the lotion to my skin. The sales representative gently encouraged me to try the product one more time after watching the video. If I still wanted a refund after trying it a second time, she’d be happy to do so. Although I was open to trying it again, that still didn’t solve the problem of the color not being right. Then she asked me the second question.
Would I like to try one of the other tanners that her company made? Why would I want to do that? After all, I assumed that all products from that company would have the same affect on my skin. No, I had made up my mind that not only would this company’s products not work for me, I reasoned that all self-tanners were faulty and I would need to look elsewhere to achieve a natural looking tan.
To make a long story short, within a few moments, the new product was on the way and I had agreed to give it a second try. This time, I watched the video, followed the directions and voila- the beautiful tan I’d been wanting appeared. Had I held on tightly to my first assumptions regarding this product, I would have lost a wonderful product that saved me a lot of time and money over a five-year period.
So what are you assuming in pageantry that may be holding you back? Ask yourself, just because it happened in the past, why must it happen again? If you do pageants for any length of time, you’ll occasionally encounter the unpleasant judge or contestant; a few pageants are unorganized and questionable; and yes you may stumble a couple times. These are single, isolated events. Learn from them and move on.
How many opportunities have you missed because of assumptions you have made in your life? When you have identified an assumption that is holding you back, ask yourself, just because it happened in the past, why must it happen again? Separate fact from the fiction.
By Rhonda Shappert
February 16, 2010 20:54